Body Talks

Washington DC-

Experts tell us that body language speaks loudest among all forms of interpersonal communication. Beyond interpersonal communication, by the way, my long-standing view is that it’s our behaviors and decisions that communicate most powerfully.

Still, it’s empirically certain that non-verbal communication (body language, facial expression, eye contact, use of space) has far greater impact than the specific content of what we are saying or our tone of voice in saying it.

So why do we pay such scant attention to our own non-verbal communication? After all, it impairs so many people in leadership positions by undercutting their persuasiveness, eroding their credibility, and alienating their teams. I see it all the time.

As with most things in life, the road to improving our non-verbal communication starts with self-awareness. This means being mindful about our physical bearing - especially in reaction to what others are saying and doing - and intentional about adjusting it. This assumes, of course, that people want to improve their effectiveness as leaders and communicators.

In her 2016 book, Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance, Dr. Angela Duckworth wrote that “most people have an inner fixed-mindset pessimist in them right alongside their inner growth-mindset optimist. Recognizing this is important because it’s easy to make the mistake of changing what we say without changing our body language, facial expressions, and behaviors.”

Interestingly and similarly, the body language expert Dr. Albert Mehrabian wrote in his seminal 1971 book, Silent Messages, “When there are inconsistencies between attitudes communicated verbally and posturally, the postural component should dominate in determining the total attitude that is inferred."

Translation? This stuff really matters, particularly when what we say is compromised by non-verbal communication that says quite the opposite.

We’ve long heard that 90 percent of interpersonal communication is non-verbal in nature, right? Wrong. Mehrabian and colleagues studied the phenomenon long ago and asserted that 55 percent of communication is body language, 38 percent is tone of voice, and seven percent is the actual words spoken. Non-verbal communications still ranks highest in its influence; just not at 90 percent. That figure seems to have been made up along the way.

As with everything in leadership and communication, of course, context matters and can shift these relative weights. Irrespective of the situation and environment, however, even at 55 percent it’s clear that body language matters most among non-verbal communications. It’s also clear in our everyday observations that we all have room for improvement in this regard.
Image courtesy of Your Story.